Ego's consciousness and the suffering it causes

Whenever thought is no longer compulsively moving and, therefore, we are not deriving our sense of self from it, our sense of reality from it, then we are free of the ordinary 'addict world of consumption,'" from the ego's consciousness and the suffering it causes.

Have you ever sat very silently its time to understand

Have you ever sat very silently, not with your attention fixed on anything, not making an effort to concentrate, but with the mind very quiet, really still? 

Then you hear everything, don’t you? You hear the far off noises as well as those that are nearer and those that are very close by, the immediate sounds—which means really that you are listening to everything. 

Your mind is not confined to one narrow little channel. If you can listen in this way, listen with ease, without strain, you will find an extraordinary change taking place within you, a change which comes without your volition, without your asking; and in that change there is great beauty and depth of insight.

To free the mind from all conditioning

To free the mind from all conditioning, you must see the totality of it without thought. This is not a conundrum; experiment with it and you will see. Do you ever see anything without thought? Have you ever listened, looked, without bringing in this whole process of reaction? You will say that it is impossible to see without thought; you will say no mind can be unconditioned. When you say that, you have already blocked yourself by thought, for the fact is you do not know.

Attachment to knowledge is not different from any other gratifying addiction.

We are the things we possess, we are that to which we are attached. 

Attachment has no nobility. Attachment to knowledge is not different from any other gratifying addiction. Attachment is self-absorption, whether at the lowest or at the highest level. 

Attachment is self-deception, it is an escape from the hollowness of the self. The things to which we are attached—property, people, ideas—become all-important, for without the many things which fill its emptiness, the self is not. The fear of not being makes for possession; and fear breeds illusion, the bondage to conclusions. Conclusions, material or ideational, prevent the fruition of intelligence, the freedom in which alone reality can come into being; and without this freedom, cunning is taken for intelligence.

 The ways of cunning are always complex and destructive. It is this self-protective cunning that makes for attachment; and when attachment causes pain, it is this same cunning that seeks detachment and finds pleasure in the pride and vanity of renunciation. The understanding of the ways of cunning, the ways of the self, is the beginning of intelligence.

Practicing Kindness Meditation is simple.

Practicing Kindness Meditation is simple. Just take a comfortable seat in a quiet place and close your eyes. First think of somebody you love. Send them the four wishes.

• May you be safe

• May you be happy

• May you be healthy

• May you be at ease

 can either repeat each for a time with that person in mind or just think about how those wishes might manifest and affect that situation. You can be creative about it.

Then move on successively to yourself, a "neutral person" (somebody you don't know well or already have strong feelings about), and then finally take the plunge and send the wishes to an "enemy." You may even notice that the choice of who the enemy is moves around and that's fine. yesterday's enemy could be tomorrow's ally. Also it's fine just to notice what comes up for you while you are trying to do this practice and simply allow space for that as well.

At the end, conclude by simply radiating out your loving kindness, your kind, sweet, loving open heart to all beings and send your good wishes to all of them (friends, oneself, neutrals, enemies, humans, animals, ghosts -- anybody you can think of). Then simply dissolve the meditation and sit quietly for a moment or two.

This practice might feel too "touchy-feely" for some of us. At first I thought maybe it was too innocent, too sweet. But it is an ancient practice dating all the way back to the Buddha and it can be surprisingly powerful. It would be great if some of us who actually try it can write in and share their experience. Or, if you wanna be grouchy and just say something about it without actually trying it that's okay too!

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• We who are experiencing the denial of our dissociated recovery are not easily emotionally ruffled.

what’s interesting is that as soon as we start to take our new action at the stages – all these old stories and beliefs rear their head

what’s interesting is that as soon as we start to take our new action at the stages – all these old stories and beliefs rear their head telling us why we can’t have our new life in our recovery that we want.



These are called limiting beliefs. But – there is also something else going on.



Deep within the limiting beliefs are the powerful voices of guilt and shame.



Our guilt voice will tell us that we are doing something wrong.



Our shame voice will tell us that we are a bad or not good enough person to ever get what we want.



The truth is that our guilt and shame voices are just mostly nonsense that we inherited from someone else. They aren’t actually true.



And yet – if we argue for our unworthiness – we will surely find ourself to be unworthy.



It’s all well and good to replace limiting beliefs with expansive beliefs, but if we really want to transform our life and fast – begin to dig into the voices of guilt and shame that lead us back to our child hidden within.



Do we ever feel like we aren’t enough?



Do we ever feel someone like us doesn’t deserve to live their recovery?



Have we tried and tried and tried and nothing has happened and decided that we are simply not meant to have what we truly desire?



What if none of these stories were true – they were just the inherited voices of guilt and shame buried deeply within our childhood memories?



What if these voices of guilt and shame aren’t self-sabotage, but self-protection?



The unknown can be so scary. And yet – it’s exactly the unknown that we must face if we are to live our recovery.



How scary is it to admit that we are indeed worthy?



What would that mean?



Would it mean that we’d have to make brand new choices that scare you?



Would it mean that if we were worthy we might have to speak up and stand out?



Not taking action on our contact with our child within is what holds us back.



The truth is, we are beyond worthy – just because we were born perfect.



Is the voice of shame clouding our true potential?



If we didn’t believe the voice of inherited shame, what would be possible in our recovery?

We will find that loving-kindness becomes the operating motivation

We will find that loving-kindness becomes the operating motivation in a situation that previously triggered anger or fear.

Recognizing and expressing goodwill have a softening effect on our hearts. At times this evokes feelings of love, tenderness, and warmth. At other times this softening of the heart can expose difficult or painful buried emotions. Allowing all these emotions to surface in their own time is one function of loving- kindness practice.

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• Loving kindness has become our chosen stage of choice, for all the times when life gets a bit rough.
• The essence of loving kindness is being able to offer happiness.
• loving-kindness is the wish that all may enjoy happiness.

Adapting ourselves to fitting in or being a rebel and standing out

Adapting ourselves to fitting in or being a rebel and standing out – all of these behaviours stem from our thoughts about what others  think. And living our lives from the perspective of what other people think creates massive pain in our lives. Because when we act based on what other people think, we are acting from the place of a deficit, that is, "We are not enough, so we are going to change ourself to be enough."



This core thought has caused A LOT of pain in our life. And I'd bet that this core thought has caused a lot of pain for you too.



The journey is that through feeling all of this pain, we come back to ourselves. And we stop identifying with what other people think we should be, or we stop rebelling against other people – and instead tune in and listen to who we really are on a heart and soul level. Comparison is the problem.



Each and every one of us, and that includes YOU, is a unique soul. We each have a unique gift. We are all great at recovery.



And life comes into balance and our fullest expression begins to be realised when we align with our true nature rather than being a part of the herd or rebelling against the herd.



The journey is within. When we listen to and act from that place – we are trendsetters – we are unique – we are special – and ain't no one else like us!



And what's cool is that when we start to belong to ourselves and express ourselves, we put out a different frequency and, as a result, we start attracting and meeting people who are on that new wavelength. And what's even cooler is that in doing so, we no longer need to chase people. When we belong to ourselves, we find who else we belong to.



The joy of living a Self -Approved life is revealed when we begin to allow ourselves to be ourselves – we accept ourselves as we are – we accept ourselves as perfectly imperfect and the inner conflict begins to die down. And our true nature emerges and our child within comes out to supports us in miraculous ways.



Are you prepared start to live a Self- Approved life today studying the stages?

What is holding us back is the obsessive and debilitating need for certainty of outcome ahead of time.

All of life is a giant leap of faith. And what holds us back is the obsessive and debilitating need for certainty of outcome ahead of time. But that is not how life works. Life requires faith, boldness and courage to step into the unknown with the knowing that my heart and intuition are always guiding me and know the way. As we step out of the way, a way will be made.



And as we take a stage towards our recovery, even though it looks like there is nothing underneath us, we know that we will be supported in our studies



We die twice: first when we give up on our recovery, and then finally at the end of our lives. But this is not the path of anyone reading this or within the chance of studying the ten stages. We want more. And that means that each and every day we take one stage, one inch or one giant leap into our personal recovery.



And in doing so, we face a fear daily – which means that every day we are going to be a little scared.



And soon enough, we build up a muscle to the fear and it becomes a normal and natural part of our lives. And after a year, two or three we cannot imagine the life we are living now – it's actually better than our present reality. But that kind of life must be earned through study and through facing our fears of the unknown child within.



Are you willing to be a little scared every day?

The true Ten Stager is a doer, not a dreamer

Our critical ingredient is getting off our butt and doing something. It's as simple as that. We have ideas, but there are few who decide to do something about them now. Not tomorrow. Not next week. But today. The true Ten Stager is a doer, not a dreamer

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Sitting quietly gazing out of the window

Sitting quietly gazing out of the window, I spied an olive tree young healthy a sparrow dropped into the left hand twigs I noticed a sign which said our olive tree, our olive tree in north east England what a presumption, an olive tree young and healthy. My mind flew to a road in Spain the earth festooned in grey olive trees the wind blowing up the dust..... I returned to the solitary sprig.

Admitting that the traumas buried in our unconscious rule our lives

 Admitting that the traumas buried in our unconscious rule our lives, makes us powerless to embody the truth, and drives us to act out in ways destructive to ourselves, to others, and to the environment.

 Come to believe that the truth at our core is more powerful than the lies imposed upon us, and that this truth can lead us into our recovery.

Taking a decision to align with our own truth, despite the pressure to submit to the distortions of family, society, and the historical voices we carry within.

We made a searching and fearless assessment of our traumatic history: personal, familial and ancestral.

 Admitting to ourselves and to a person of our choice the full details of our past.

 Become entirely ready to grieve this past and to let go of our falsely constructed self.

 Aligning with our true self and doing the deep and transforming work of grieving our losses.

Study that's right studying ways we have hurt ourselves, others and the environment through replication of our traumas, and finally  becoming willing to make amends to ourselves and them all.
 Changing our inappropriate behavioural repetitions.
 Continuing to monitor our attitudes and behaviour, and when we make a mistake we promptly admit it, trace its traumatic origin, and take steps to not repeat it.

 Seeking through self-reflection an ever deepening connection to truth, desiring only to be guided to our life’s calling.

Having awakened to our inner calling, we dedicate our lives to its full manifestation and to nurturing the healing paths of others.